i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
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