oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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