Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
