:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Randomize
