you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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