O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
