tell your sister to shave her snatch
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Randomize
