matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
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