Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
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