Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize