I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
