yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
