Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
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