we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
