we're chasing vodka with high fives
He uses pillows to masturbate.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
