'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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