I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Randomize
