sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
