the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
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