I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
