I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
As shirtless as possible
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Randomize
