You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Still dying that you shit outside
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
