my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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