it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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