I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Randomize
