i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
