she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Randomize
