dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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