Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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