We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Randomize
