So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
