There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Randomize
