being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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