Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Randomize
