rhymes with "ouble enetration"
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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