My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Randomize
