dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Randomize
