Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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