Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize
