What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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