I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize