just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Randomize