Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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