and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
Randomize
