She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
