Please, let me fuck your mom
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
