you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
