Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
So squirting runs in the family.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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