my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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