It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
