I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Randomize
